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Raising a Defiant Child

January 6, 2012 by  
Filed under Uncategorized

Yes, the defiant child is mine.

by Robyn Swatsburg

Yes. The defiant child is mine. But please understand. He isn’t trying to embarrass you or mock you. He isn’t challenging you because he wants to. He is angry or upset. He may be angry or upset because of something you did or said or because of something else. He will tell you when he is no longer angry or upset. He will explain and apologize and make it better. But right now he is defiant and there is nothing he can do to stop that. He will not lose. He will stop at nothing. One day he will be able to but not today. I know how angry that makes you. I know you think he needs to learn a lesson now. From you. I would like to say that would help but it won’t. As the adult, you need to help him. You need to not challenge him so he can not lose. So he can stop being angry or upset and come back to explain, apologize, and make it better. He will, but you need to break the cycle because right now he cannot. Yes, the defiant child is mine, but I need your help understanding him.

I don’t know how he will end up, but today, at least, I think he will be okay.

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