The Science of Life
by Mommy MD Guides blogger Julie Davidson
Are you a baker? I’m not. But I do know that you have to get the timing right. Cakes, cookies, muffins—there’s a science to it. And there’s a whole lotta’ science to pregnancy too. Like the fact that the baby ideally should stay inside the mom until 39 weeks. So it’s totally normal to get nervous from day one about miscarrying.
I kept thinking things like, If I can make it a few more days, that’ll be a week. A few more weeks, and that’ll be a month. And after a few months, I should be good. And then you start doing things that you’re sure will keep the baby in there. I stopped putting chemicals in my hair. And hit the treadmill—until I broke it. I even ate broccoli, which is quite possibly the most unattractive and foul-tasting vegetable there is. No cigarettes, soda, or alcohol. And I still had a miscarriage.
Maybe you saw the movie The Odd Life of Timothy Green. The couple in the movie is unable to conceive. Just before they succumb to the fact that they will not physically bear children, they write down all the characteristics their dream child would have. Then they bury that list in their garden. That should have been the end of it, but well, it’s a movie, and you have to get your 10 buck’s worth, so there’s more. Like a kid who shows up covered in mud and sprouting small leaves on him. Some people grow turnips—they grew a kid.
So the couple gets attached to the kid. And—spoiler alert—slowly his leaves turn brown and he disappears. The couple is devastated. If you see the film, you can see a parallel between that and a lot of the more difficult times you’ll endure in life. Including a miscarriage. And it’s not my intention to tell you that such an event is no big deal. I curled up in bed, couldn’t look at anyone who was pregnant, and kicked back a few cocktails. Wallowing in self-pity became a full-time job.
At some point, I started to come out of my funk. I realized I hadn’t done anything to cause the miscarriage. As in the movie, you see that some of life’s most traumatic situations are a function of science and not a failure of ours. Burning the cookies? That one’s on us.