Maybe you aren’t a big planner, but somehow, the closer you get to having kids, you start trying to get organized. Or as close to it as you can. You get the house ready. You have your showers. The car seat is finally installed correctly, and your bag is packed.
And after the baby arrives, so do the guests. I used to think it would be best to just have it be my husband and me at the hospital, but then I realized that people really want to share in your joy and excitement. And as I found out, they bring gifts! But who and when do you call or Facebook? You don’t want to forget anyone, but you also don’t want to assume that everyone will want to be there. As it turns out, word spreads like wildfire. You tell one person, and they’ll tell 50!
Our first son was born via C-section. So we had a little over an hour to get the word out. By the time I dressed for surgery, three friends were already at the hospital. My very own pregnancy posse, ready to cheer me on. And I was grateful because it kept my mind off the fact that my life, my sanity, and my abdomen were about to change forever.
After the surgery, guests drifted into the recovery room. And I drifted into a haze of confusion. They were so cheerful, while foggy best describes my mental state. Plus, I was numb from the anesthesia. Foggy and numb. It was like the morning after a bachelorette party. So not the way I wanted to start my new role as a mom. I kept obsessing about two things: why I couldn’t feel my legs and where my baby was. Meanwhile, our visitors were gushing about how beautiful the baby was. At one point, a nurse told me my brother got to hold the baby. I was confused. I hadn’t seen my brother or the baby, but they had already met!
During my stay at the hospital, guests continued to stop by. It was nice to have support. But I was exhausted, trying to heal from surgery and battling how to get the baby to nurse. Nothing breaks up a good gathering like showing off your bloody dressing or whipping out your boob and trying not to cry as your newborn latches on tighter than a suction cup.
You love your friends. But they get that you may need a little space. As you tactfully usher them to the hallway, make sure to invite them to your house. You’ll need some company after you finally find your legs, some of your sanity, and that kid you apparently had.